Why I Chose to Self-Publish

When I first decided to publish My Little Big Secret, I assumed that I would pursue the traditional publishing route. I began researching publishers and eventually found one whose focus on diversity and representation aligned closely with my own values. Feeling hopeful, I submitted my manuscript and waited.

And waited.

And waited some more.

Eventually, I had to confront a reality that every aspiring author learns: traditional publishing is incredibly competitive. Thousands of manuscripts are submitted every year, and only a very small percentage ever make it to publication.

I understood that this was simply how the industry worked. Authors often spend years submitting their work, collecting rejection letters, and waiting for the right opportunity. While I have enormous respect for those who persevere through that process, I quickly realised it wasn't the path I wanted to take. I did not want to wait for an undefined amount of time nor risk losing the confidence I had in what I had written.

The truth is, I believed in my story. I had written something that felt meaningful to me, and I didn't want to spend years waiting for someone else to decide whether it was worthy of being shared. I wanted to put it into the hands of children and families who might benefit from its message.

Self-publishing certainly comes with its own challenges. It requires a significant investment of time, money, and energy, and there are no guarantees of success. But it also offers something incredibly valuable: creative freedom.

From the beginning, I had a very clear vision for this book and the people I wanted it to represent. As a Black Muslim woman, it was important to me that the characters reflected experiences and identities that are often underrepresented in children's books. This story was inspired in part by my nieces and nephews, and I wanted them to be able to see themselves and their family dynamic reflected in the pages of a book. Representation wasn't something I was willing to compromise on.

I also wanted the illustrations to align as closely as possible with my values and understanding of Islamic guidelines. While creating a children's book that was colourful, engaging, and imaginative, I wanted to ensure that those considerations remained part of the creative process. By choosing to self-publish, I was able to maintain control over every aspect of the project, from the story and illustrations to the design, branding, and overall direction of the book.

But of course, creative freedom comes at a cost. Throughout this journey, I've had to become far more than an author. At various points I've been a publisher, project manager, designer, marketer, content creator, researcher, and problem solver. I've learned skills I never expected to need and acquired an alarming amount of obscure publishing knowledge. It has been challenging, frustrating, overwhelming, exciting, and deeply rewarding; sometimes all within the same day.

However, one of the greatest gifts of self-publishing has been discovering what I'm capable of. Every obstacle has forced me to learn something new, and every stage of the process has strengthened my confidence in my ability to adapt and figure things out.

The biggest challenge with self-publishing is that success depends largely on your ability to reach the people who will connect with your work. There are no guarantees that all the time, effort, and investment will pay off. That reality can be intimidating. But for me, the risk was worth taking.

At the end of this journey, regardless of the outcome, I would have created something that was entirely my own; something that reflects my values, my vision, and the message I wanted to share with the world. And that alone makes the journey worthwhile.